Flocks of Birds and Mummified Bodies

I typed this line (spelling errors corrected) into an email late one night about being dropped from a MeetUp list:

That’s fine - remove me from your list. But can I still trust flocks of birds 
and mummified bodies from now

Fortunately it did not get sent. I found it later in my drafts folder. So what does this missive mean?
It means that I keep going, fighting sleep as I push myself to do more, writing emails late at night when I should be in bed.

I sleep a short time each night. Usually 5 hours at the most. Sleeping aids that I've tried do not help. Something in me wants to make the most of my waking hours. So much to do, so much I really want to do.

I woke up this morning around 5:00 and started thinking about a trip to visit my aunt in Florida. She proposed it again in a FaceBook message. From there why not go to Mexico, the Yucatan, or Costa Rica or Peru and Machu Picchu? I have never been to these places and have been longing to see these equatorial lands. The thought made me jump from my bed, but with no meds yet in my system, a shuffling walk took me to the computer to research the possibilities.

"Something in me wants to make the most of my waking hours." My 60th birthday just passed. My desire is to make the most of the remainder of my life. I want to follow the birds, not become a mummified body.

Slightly insane with ukulele friends at my 60th birthday party

Another Season

Change happens, and even little changes nudge my life into new paths. Some things as they say, "fall by the wayside," and other things take their place. My life is not as full as it once was in some ways, but where there are holes, I usually fill them up again.

Before I started taking meds, things were dropping away relentlessly. I couldn't do many things that I used to, or they were too hard, too slow, or too embarrassing to do. The meds have enabled me to take on new things let alone keeping what I already had in my life before the PD. I am grateful for that. 

My side effects are minimal. Sometimes my legs are bouncing or I sway back and forth rhythmically, but its not debilitating or constant. 

So when I started this blog with the optimistically drug-free title, I was opposed to taking meds. The fear of the side effects and distrust of the acrimonious drug companies and medical drug peddlers were strong factors in my postponement of taking my prescription. I still have those feelings, but I accept the drugs as an obvious boon. That doesn't mean they work for everyone. I was lucky - they worked very well for me.

In a few days I will be turning 60. The questions for me now are: 

HOW LONG CAN I KEEP TAKING MEDS AND LIVE A FULL LIFE WITHOUT SIDE EFFECTS?

WILL I EVER DECIDE TO EMBRACE A "RADICAL" TREATMENT APPROACH TO TRY TO ACTUALLY RECOVER FROM PD?

WILL THERE BE A MEDICAL OR ALTERNATIVE AND ACCESSIBLE MEDICAL CURE FOR PD IN MY LIFETIME?

These three questions lead to a lot more questions. Questions are good, I should ask more. And it would behoove me to do more research in the area of PD, but I have not. I blithely pass my days in activities many of which, I believe, are helpful to my condition, and some maybe not, but thanks to the drugs, I forget at times that I even have an illness. That is wonderful - to forget - and just LIVE.

The Delaware River from Goat Hill in Lambertville NJ
(also the photo above is from the same hilltop)